Risk of No REF Submission? REF Papers/Books FOR U
Haven't got enough publications for REF? Head of School giving you a hard time or waving teaching only contract at you? Fear not!
Top Newchange University researchers and professors from wide range of disciplines are lined up waiting to write top 4-rated template papers for you! From economics, philosophy to life sciences, original ideas ready to hit the page - you don't need to do anything but talk to one of our REF advisors in the school of experimental publishing who will link you up with your "Templator".
Email in the first instance to REF13Help@newchange.ac.uk.Salikemistuff and Npiste explained to our Newchange Today reporter that the aim of the advertisement was to create discussion and not to actually line up REF13 Template Writers. Despite this, Salikemistuff suggested that he had little problem with the concept given that it probably wouldn't be so new an idea anyway,
"I wouldn't be surprised if stuff of this nature is actually going on already. Nor could I really condemn it when I think about what it really means in the broader significance of university jobs, and the struggle to fulfill the significant work that is expected of us. There is a peculiar secrecy around our work which means that colleagues rarely talk (seriously) about their inability to fit all their work into working hours - or anything close to that - so that people are left pretending to be superheros.
But there are no superheros. Get a colleague on a bad day and the truth comes out. All around me I have seriously depressed colleagues who have for many years struggled to fit research into their work schedules, and have had to sacrifice holiday leave and time with family to publish - year on year. As such, we cannot be surprised after years of crap earnings, and pretty lamentable working conditions in some schools, if scholars start a new kind of intellectual exchange which is based upon sharing work to meet REF targets".Our present Vice-Chancellor who was caught unprepared told us that the news "shocks the f*** out of me. I've just finished breakfast and I feel like breakfast is now running in an undesirable direction". Not suitably prepped for careful wording, our VC has quickly condemned the REFTemplating service and has vowed that he "will not rest until disciplinary action has been brought in respect of "every f***er involved in the publication of this advert" on the Official Newchange Site" .
[I] will not rest until disciplinary action has been brought in respect of "every f***er involved in the publication of this advert.
By contrast, the in-coming Vice-Chancellor at Newchange, Professor Gordon G. Gordon III who is joining us from The University of American Life in Belgium, has taken quite a different stance,
"I'm a market man. Anyone who knows me here in Antwerp would describe me as a market man. In respect of the question "Should we do X?", my response is "let the people's morality speak - let the market act as our guide". So, in respect of this REF13 Template Service, I'll be exploring those that have devised this service - I need a team of people who are thinkers, idea-ers, blue sky-ers - some of the ideas may bear no fruit, be illicit, but what I want, are ideas. Universities are now so firmly in the market-place, a market man like me, needs market people. This idea sounds innovative."
